The Darndest Things: I Said, He Heard

My son has been speeding through every book in sight and I was starting to get that we-need-more-books-quick feeling. What to do…My general policy is to pre-read everything he reads, but that becomes difficult if you have a speedy reader on your hands.

And then I remembered The Hobbit.

This book met all my criteria: approved by mom, and, though difficult, already read aloud as a family to promote his comprehension.

So I put the book on his desk in his room with a note on it which said something to the effect of, “If you would like to read this book, you may. I only ask that you read slowly enough to read every single word. No skipping around. If you need help reading or understanding something, please ask Mom or Dad. Love, Mommy.”

When I said that he could ask for assistance, I was assuming, for instance, that he might not remember how to pronounce Gandalf’s name, or an Elven word.

But no.

What he heard was permission to have a spontaneous book club whenever he liked.

It was 2:00 pm on Sunday afternoon. By 2:10 pm, he made his first visit.

“Are trolls bad?”

Ten minutes later: “Why do dwarfs see so well in the dark?”

Seven minutes later: “Are elves taller than hobbits?”

Twelve minutes later: “What exactly is a hobbit, anyhow?”

And so on and so forth for two hours.

When I got home today from taking Si to the doctor, do you think I was greeted by hugs and kisses? Oh, no.

“What’s a gollum?”

It is going to be a long week.